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Would you forgive your husband if ET signed up for year adult dating service?

We Have a newborn and I just stumbled across Some e-mails from about 19 months ago in historical email. It Was Before We Were married aim We Were living together. We Have Been together 5 yrs and His dad just HAD Passed away then. They Were year for signing up for adult dating / swingers service and e-mails ET feel to Another Including torque and has naked pics naked video. He claims ET That Meet ’em and never DID WAS doing it for attention to Because He Himself felt bad about b / c of comments made about history I Had sexual prowess in the heat of argument year. He felt bad about ET Said it so Could not go through with it. The last email is from Him and says That Did not really want ET to say no and no hard feelings There Were there historical end goal THEY That Would not really say night and Which He Was Asking Them Which night THEY wanted to Meet . He Said the rest of the communication by IM and ET WAS Does not Have a copy so I have no proof That He Did Meet Them About did gold and do not know if I Believe Him. I do not know how to stop thinking of this and feeling hurt When I See Him and do not know if I can trust Him. He HAS aussi year end with Constantly downloading pornography in secret etc.. and He Has Promised to stop Several times Recently this has-been and Unable to. Any advice would be great! Thanks. . .

18 comments

  1. I would not trust him… how can you? You need to think about this long and hard – he is showing you he has no integrity.

    Thumbs down…? People – ok would you prefer i say to her – ok, forgive him, it was a joke, he did not mean it… people, bury your heads in the sand of you want.. I am not going to..

  2. Panic! at the disco freak

    No he is a bitch! he obviously isnt good enough for you
    answer mine plz
    http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AgMviheUFxwhGuHgHSjPPoLsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20100215080444AACBwsI

  3. It seems that you definitely have a trust issue. You are justified in having this trust issue due to his actions. Ask him if he would be open to counciling. If not, I think you probably can’t trust him.

  4. Downloading and looking at porn is one thing, but joining an adult dating service is an attempt to act on it. No, I don’t think I could forgive him. And no, I don’t think I could trust him. It would more than likely be the end of us.

  5. He’s going to be stepping out. Whether you choose to forgive him is your own affair, your own responsibility. You can accept or not accept, but you can’t change it. Welcome to the real world.

  6. Have you shut him off? I hate it when women don’t put out and expect the man to keep it in his trousers.I’m not saying that’s you but it happens all the time.I wish I have good advise for you.

  7. Porn and all apsects of it are such a turn off for me, no I wouldn’t forgive him. Especially if i had a child in the home. If he is addicted to it, nothing you can ever do as his wife will be enough for him.

  8. Maybe next time you will think twice before commenting on his lack of sexual prowess.

  9. You reap what you sow.
    You tell him he sucks in bed and yet he’s faithful to you how exactly is he going to get better on his own?
    Being ‘trained’ by a sexually prowessed married couple sounds like a good plan – it is essentially what you *asked* him to do.

    You need to change your craptastic attitude about your relationship and realize there is another person in it.
    Casting the net out is nothing close to eating the fish.
    It was two years ago and before you were married.
    You also did something awful to him.
    Do you think he is *ever* going to forget what you said to him?

    Stop trying to make him stop watching porn.
    Get to work on yourself and your relationship and /encourage/ him to do the same then the porn will minimize on it’s own.

    If your sex-life sucks, it is >your< fault. You have to do something positive about it. Blaming him is not going to help either of you. This starts with an apology from you and an admission that you are not as involved in your sex-life as you ought to be and that we both need to lovingly explore and learn together.

  10. Wow! Sorry to hear this has happened just after having a baby. Wish it could have happened 12 months ago. You are learning how your husband is a little late in the game. Most people are probably going to tell you to get counseling and try to work it out. With the time past and all he was into I can’t. My advice is to see a good attorney and start thinking of a new life. Sorry again!

  11. What another woman would do with this situation has no bearing on what your decision should be. I suspect you are wanting someone to say forgive him. You can choose to live your life thinking about this day in and day out or you can choose not to. We all know that you are not going anywhere, so you have to decide what you will allow to be part of your daily thoughts.

  12. Sorry, but if he was really feeling bad about himself, the last thing he would’ve done was put out a naked video of himself! He is a liar. Too bad you didn’t find out until after the wedding. Now you are forced to deal with this AGGRESSIVELY. Cut off the computer ties. You are his wife now, and you have to take control of your life. Your husband belomgs to you and your kid(s). Step up, take charge, and make him cut the crap. You need to keep one eye on him at all times. Otherwise, he will drift away, and I don’t think you really want that. Good Luck

  13. do not trust him …avoid him at all costs…..take a vacation with ur newborn……see how long HE can live without u.

    hope that helps =]

  14. Sounds like he needs counseling.

  15. First, you asked him and he told you everything. This was before you were married, you were pregnant and your hormones were going up and down you may not have wanted to get to close to him. Forgive him – he lost his father. Regarding the porn – I think if he’s ready he could go to counseling or a group like AA – He’s not the only one that looks at porn. Int the future – I would stay away from comments about any part of his body and he should stay away from comments about yours. Just keep the communication open and talk tings out. You now have a child and you had 5 good years together. Good luck.

  16. I get the porn thing because it’s just visual stimluation – nothing else. There is not any good reason for a person in a serious relationship to sign up on a dating service of any type.

  17. K…first of all…in the future, be more careful what you say in the heat of an arguement, especially when it comes to his manhood..that being said….it dosen’t justify his behaviour. He’s a player and he’s trying to put it on you. Fuck him. Move on. He’s an arsehole.

  18. Sorry no way I would have showed him the door married or living together.He has a sex addiction that is obvious.Pictures,videos,downloading pornography.This is serious in your relationship.But if I was you and just having a new born,I would stop thinking about your husbands addictions and make your baby first.why?Any stress you have the baby feels it and if breastfeeding they say the milk gets sour.So put your husband on the sofa and tell him in a few weeks if he hasn’t seek an addiction therapist that he will be out.You deserve to be respected as his wife.And his child needs a non-sex addicted for a father.Tell him what will his child think of him when grows up.And don’t let him blame you for a comment that you said.Tell him to be a man and admit to his unfaithfulness.

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