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WHAT WOULD YOU DO IN THIS SITUATION?? (Adult Friend Finder website)?

Recently I started dating this guy who I Thought WAS genuinely nice. He opens doors, buys me flowers, makes me dinner, is affectionate, and Takes Me Out and refuse to let me pay. We’ve been out five times and never He Has Tried to “put the moves” on me. I really liked HIM. So, Being That I Have Had a broken heart Many Times and am scared to trust, I start looking for HIM to be dating websites see if ET is up to anything shady. We are not exclusive at all, I do want to aim know who I am dealing with. After Going Through a great deal of websites, I find That He Has a “Gold” membership is active Adult Friend Finders (a site Exclusively for sex, not Relationships). He last logged on yesterday. Stated His ad looking for a “discreet encounter.” That sickened me. I Would not trip if He Was Gold Match is Yahoo Personals. . . . objective ET is on a site just for s e x. So, what do I do? I went snooping (my bad) but look what I found. Should I Tell Him to get lost or what? It Is not That He Is Dating Others That bugs me. It belongs to ET Is That Which is a site Exclusively for sex (with strangers).


  1. do what you want. there is nothign wrong with what he is doing. you said it yourself- you are not exclusive with him. if he is a gol dmember, he has been a paying member of that site, maybe for a while. if you like him that much, don’t pass judgement on him. if you guys get exclusive, then you’ll need to make that decision. otherwise, relax. he can still be a nice guy AND be looking for sex! ~SHOCKER!~ nice guys like sex too…

  2. lwheavenlyangel

    You did the right thing by finding out who this guy is, there’s so many men that perpetrate and as women we need to do our homework before we begin trusting anyone that we do not know.

    If the two of you are just dating and that’s all and he has a right to date other women, then I would let it go until we became exclusive. Until then, he’s fair game.

  3. If that little tidbit of information doesn’t sit well with you, then stop seeing the guy. You don’t know him very well at this point, so it’s better to get rid of him now. And he doesn’t owe you any kind of explanation or anything, so just let it fizzle out with him. He’s obviously got something going on behind all that sweet stuff he’s been doing for you. Unless you’re curious and you want to know whether he’s changed his mind and is looking for something more real than a discreet encounter, then you might want to stick around, but be cautious about it.

  4. “nice guys like sex too”, as the first answerer said—-yea but not sex with strangers, lotsa sex….”discreet encounter”???? Bad news. Definitely tell him, say a friend saw him (if one of your friends met him) online, or just say you randomly came upon him. See what he says.
    You’re lucky you found out so early on.

  5. saintly_angeline

    Since you aren’t exclusive you really don’t have any say in the matter what he does with his time. But if it really makes you uncomfortable follow your instincts, but you also have to realize sometimes just because they have something like that on there doesn’t mean they go thru with it either. If worse comes to worse make up a screen name and fake picture and test him on it. If he’s agreeing to meet with you than you know the answer if he’s not agreeing than who knows.

    I went thru the samething with my boyfriend of 4 1/2 yrs, except my cousins went online and found his screen name at all sorts of websites they emailed me the sites and I basically made names in those sites and emailed him with my picture asking ‘You look familiar do I know you from somewhere?’ to see what his reactions would be. Lets just say even though I’ve accepted his apologizes every now and than I am tempted to see if he’s doing the samethings again, but I don’t because like most he probably uses a different screen name now.

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